I ran this morning to work, it’s an 8km journey and it took me the usual 40mins. However, I also ran yesterday evening -a gentle 5km to see how my ankle fared. The ankle was fine, and it was OK when I got up. So I tied my laces, packed my work clothes into the rucksack and set off. During the run I could feel it was tight but nothing bad. I kept running. The tightness increased but I put it down to recovery and tight calves from the run yesterday. I kept running.
Stretching when I arrived at work and a nice walk for a cool down I went into the shower. By the time I’d dried off the ankle was sore. The Achilles heal was hurting once again. Not an ache but a jagged paid and the creaking was worse.
Why did I run? I clearly didn’t have enough rest? My goals of running two marathons in October is in jeopardy. I guess I need to hear what the physio says tomorrow. Although I’m dreading hearing that I’ll need to rest. I know that’s what he will say. I know he will tell me to do eccentric exercises to strengthen the heel. He may even tell me it is going to be an injury I’ll have for a long time and that it will repeat itself. He will tell me it in an unsympathetic way, or even a patronising way. I just know this but I suppose I need to hear it from the professional just to give myself peace of mind.
I’m fed up now. I was before, but now I am really fed up with being injured. I just want to get out there, on the trails and the inner city routes. I want to be pain free, I want to run without being over cautious. I want that miracle cure. It isn’t going to come and I just need to accept that.
I feel like I’ve let myself down, I feel I’ve failed and I haven’t already started. I feel I might not be able to recover from this. I don’t know what to do.
This is depressing so I am going to stop.